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The Power of Positive Thinking in My Life

Posted on 12 Mar 2006 In: Motivational

Overall, I really haven’t had a difficult life - no major tragedy or devastating illnesses to conquer - but I have had my share of challenges. I’ve had financial obstacles, marital discord, family dysfunction, and the like; and yet, I am where I am today is due in large part to how I handled each of these events in my life. While in the midst of these various annoyances (which is as much credit as I will give them) many outsiders commented that they didn’t know how I managed to stay so upbeat and positive when for all intents and purposes, the world as I knew it was crumbling around me - at least from their perspective!

Me, on the other hand, I have just always seen these things as opportunities… times to begin anew, moments to seize as a lesson to be learned, events that opened new doors. And I have always been of the belief that nothing in life happens to us without a reason. So if I have to endure a particular experience, I might as well turn it into a positive, instead of getting bogged down in the negative. Afterall, when I’m smack in the middle of something that isn’t all that desirable, moaning and complaining certainly isn’t going to change it. In fact, it will only make it worse because that is what I have chosen to dwell on.

Instead, I take a deep breath and repeat to myself, “This too shall pass…” And you know what? It always does! And once I have moved through the “crisis du jour,” I always discover that I have come out further ahead - either from a new experience, a new idea, or a new opportunity that wasn’t present before the upheaval.

This retrospect is great, but it is the period of time that we are experiencing the turmoil which is the tricky part. I know that, and I acknowledge to you that if you are in the middle of something challenging right now as you read this, that what I am suggesting you do is asking a lot.

If you were just laid off and don’t know where your next meal is coming from, my cheerful admonishing to “think positive” doesn’t do much to inspire you - let alone quell the hungar. In fact, it may make you want to gag! But life is full of solutions and if you focus on how bad things are, you won’t ever see the opportunity that is right in front of you. Your negativity will cloud the picture and obscure brighter paths that will let you rise above your current situation.

My next post will be an exercise that will start helping you to put these concepts into play in your own life and in real time.

… All you have to do is want it!

Were You Born Walking?

Posted on 10 Nov 2005 In: Motivational

Wow, I heard it again today, “I’m not stupid, really I’m not!”

This was a comment from a Newbie who was expressing her frustration with the mountain of concepts and skills she was facing while trying to get started in Internet Marketing. And what does she currently do for a living? She’s a biologist! Yes, a biologist with accreditations a mile long and she felt the need to “convince” me she was not ’stupid?’

Her statement would have surprised me if it weren’t for the fact that I’ve heard it hundreds times over my 15 year career in the computer industry. There is something about computers and technology that reduces the best and the brightest to their knees. They somehow feel that because technology is all around them, that they are inept if they haven’t absorbed it all by osmosis.

And yet, as I have posed the question over and over, did they feel “stupid” the first time they got behind the wheel of a car because they couldn’t drive immediately? Could someone who had never seen a cockpit, jump in the seat and fly high into the sky? And yes, were ANY of us born walking?

At one point or another in all of our lives there was a task or a skill that we knew nothing about. And likewise, after learning, studying, practicing. we now perform that skill without a second thought. So why then should the Internet be any different? Why should registering a domain name or building a website be considered a skill we were born with?

It is all about learning and taking little steps. It is about starting somewhere and building a foundation from that point forward. But most importantly, no one should ever make you feel like a second class citizen because you don’t know the proper html coding to create a hyperlink - in fact, you’re not even “stupid” if you didn’t understand the first part of this sentence!
It is critical that you develop a mindset that you are embarking on a new and exciting adventure in whatever you are in the process of pursuing. It is a grand and glorious time of learning! Each day you will add to your bank of knowledge and accomplish something that you previously may not have even known existed.

And the learning never stops! Because, yes, it becomes addictive.

Once you take that first step, you want to take another, and another and pretty soon, much like the infant learning to walk you are exploring the whole room. And no sooner than you make it across the room, you realize there is another room adjacent to the first. Then there is the outside world to explore - what great excitement THAT will be. And so on and so on.
This, my dear friends is how you should approach each day and each new task that is facing you on your journey to Internet success and marketing fortunes (or any other endeavors you are pursuing for that matter!) Like the little child who is exploring new territory for the first time, you too should bring that same enthusiasm into your world.

And when you fall? Don’t think you’re the first and get your head right that it won’t be the last! Embrace the mistakes that you make along the way, because in reality, it is from the mistakes that you will learn the most. What is revealed to you through the course of faltering is a greater education about something new.

Even the noted Marketing Guru’s have words for it that place a positive spin on the whole concept: They “test” their copy, and they “sample” their audience. They don’t call it “trial and error,” but in essence that’s exactly what it is and there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. Because what works today might not work tomorrow, and what is a hot seller this week may be outdated by technological advances that are already in the works around the world before you get up in the morning. And through it all, you will be better for the experience, so embrace it. Mistakes are NOT fatal! They are stepping stones to new avenues!

So the next time you hear someone say, “I’m not stupid.” or the next time you start to utter those words yourself, stop dead in your tracks and picture this in your mind’s eye:
A little child pulls himself up and takes his first step, then takes a shaky second step and plops to the ground. He looks up at the expectant adults holding cameras nearby and says,
“I’m not stupid, really, I’m not!”

Hold this picture in your mind and you will never again feel compelled to apologize for your lack of knowledge in an area that you have never experienced before, I promise!

Who are the Crabs in Your Life?

Posted on 5 Nov 2005 In: Motivational

Going through my photo album the other day, I ran across one of those types of pictures that take you immediately back to a place and time so clearly you relive it. You know the ones, where you can feel the crisp air, smell the aroma, embrace the warmth of a thought or an emotion. This was one of those photos.

My wide-eyed daughter was experiencing her first trip to the beach, complete with shovels and buckets and lathered in suntan lotion so her tender skin didn’t burn. I can still remember the aroma of the coconut scent as I reflect on the observations of her tiny, but all too astute mind.
She had discovered sand crabs that day, and to her delight they were everywhere for the taking. Bucket in hand, she was delighted every time she saw the telltale signs of the air bubbles popping up from beneath the sand.

Periodically, she would come over to me and introduce me to each of her new friends by name. You see, she was hosting a party and as she walked up and down the beach, she would add one of her new found friends to the bucket so that they would be all assembled and ready when the party was to commence.

After observing this routine for quite some time, I began to notice that every so often she would stare into the bucket and wrinkle her nose in that special way that warms a mother’s heart. As she stared into the bucket it looked to me like she would carefully pick one of the crabs up, leave it in the sand and then walk away.

I was very curious to hear the reasoning behind this process, but was nowhere near ready for the impact of her explanation.

The next time she returned to introduce me to more of her new friends, I told her I noticed that she was taking some of the crabs out of her bucket and asked her why.
“Well, mommy, I don’t want those ones at my party,” she exclaimed quickly. Figuring this was going to be one of those life lessons I keep an eye out for, I prepared to tell her that it was important to include all of her friends in her party.
But instead, it was I who received the lesson.

She went on to explain that some of the crabs were trying to crawl out of the bucket and other crabs were reaching up and pulling them back down. At this point, I figured that the ones who were trying to crawl away were the one that she was removing.
But to my surprise she exclaimed, “No, silly, the ones that are trying to crawl out of the bucket are just really excited to get to my party first. I am getting rid of the ones that are pulling them down. THEY are the ones that don’t get to come to my party because they are not excited enough…

How many “crabs” are there in your life that don’t share your enthusiasm for getting to the party first? Odds are, there are at least a few. You know, the ones who are always trying to pull you back down to the bottom of the bucket? And do any of us have the child-like wisdom to “discard” those crabs and press on toward filling our bucket with new ones?
Now of course, unlike my daughter’s crabs, we can’t simply toss our crabs aside and walk away. That will be a lesson for her to learn another day. But for the rest of us, we need to get a second bucket for these “special” crabs that don’t share our enthusiasm and understand that they don’t share the same space with those who motivate, inspire and encourage us to do our very best!
Cherish and cultivate the bucket which contains positive people in your life and never overlook an opportunity to fill that bucket to the brim! The heavier it gets and the more it overflows you will begin to notice great things coming your way. I promise!

I’m glad I’ve added you to MY bucket! And I hope I will soon occupy a special place in yours!

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    To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage.
    Lao Tzu
    Quotes from Secret Chalice


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